Subject: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: Captain Infinity Newsgroups: alt.lifestyle.furry,alt.fan.tom-servo,alt.religion.kibology,alt.fan.cecil-adams Message-ID: <35293d02.95660340@news-f.std.com> Do squirrels think that humans hang wires from poles so they can cross the street safely? If so, do they ever feel betrayed in the last second before being electrocuted? And what the *hell* do they make of that pair of sneakers? ** Captain Infinity "...an animal loses not only its life but also its third dimension." --Roger M. Knutson, Flattened Fauna: A Field Guide to Common Animals of Roads, Streets,and Highways
Subject: Re: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: Blackhawk Newsgroups: alt.lifestyle.furry,alt.fan.tom-servo,alt.religion.kibology,alt.fan.cecil-adams Message-ID: <openbook-0204982257460001@ppp-asft10--060.sirius.net> In article <73F839037848CB1F.0A6D87B9F29DD434.E62F8394FCC7846F@library-proxy.airnews.net>, fang wrote: > On Fri, 3 Apr 1998 01:44:56 GMT, Infinity@world.std.com (Captain > Infinity) wrote: > > >Do squirrels think that humans hang wires from > >poles so they can cross the street safely? > > > >If so, do they ever feel betrayed in the last > >second before being electrocuted? > > > > They get electrocuted? What else are they touching besides the wire? > Those electric lines are safe to touch as long as you aren't grounded. Interesting. So tell me, if your "ground of being" is out, are you in danger or are you safe as long as you remain relatively high? > > > what the *hell* do they make of that pair of sneakers? I think Rocky always used them for a good running start. ** Bulwinklhawk Just do it in your upsidaisium soles!
Subject: Re: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: Allen Greiner Newsgroups: alt.lifestyle.furry,alt.fan.tom-servo,alt.religion.kibology,alt.fan.cecil-adams Message-ID: <3524FC06.4644C4EA@bellsouth.net> Fangz wrote: > > They get electrocuted? What else are they touching besides the wire? > Those electric lines are safe to touch as long as you aren't grounded. > Having once been a lineman, and seen one or two squirrels and a few birds light up, let me elucidate: While high-tension lines use wide spacing and heavy insulators to avoid any type of short circuits, branch circuits on a residential street do not. On a normal branch circuit, you will have a static line (lightning protection) at the top of the pole, and then (generally) three electrical cables attached to each pole about a foot apart. Each of these cables carry about 250 volts with a capacity of around 1500 to 2500 amperes of current each. Sometimes these wires are bare to the elements, sometimes they are insulated and attached to a cable that carries the weight. On older insulated cables, the insulation can be degraded to the point where either bare wire is showing or the insulation is easily punctured. Next, note that squirrels have very sharp claws and long tails. Imagine said squirrel travelling down an electrical line. Squirrel's claw punctures insulation. No problem, since he is not grounded. Then a gust of wind makes cable sway. Squirrel swings tail for balance and contacts either static line or next cable, which has a bare spot without insulation. Instant potential difference between claw and tail of around 250 volts. Current now flows because squirrel is a conductor. Result: instant barbequed squirrel. Same thing with large birds...wings and claws. Hope that clears it up. Regards, Al
Subject: Re: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: Ben Walsh Newsgroups: alt.lifestyle.furry,alt.fan.tom-servo,alt.religion.kibology,alt.fan.cecil-adams Message-ID: <35250C6D.6AAC@iona.nospam.please.wereirish.com> Allen Greiner wrote: > > Fangz wrote: > > > > They get electrocuted? What else are they touching besides the wire? > > Those electric lines are safe to touch as long as you aren't grounded. > > > Having once been a lineman, and seen one or two squirrels and a few > birds light up, let me elucidate: Did you work for the county? In Wichita? ben
Subject: Re: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: Allen Greiner Newsgroups: alt.lifestyle.furry,alt.fan.tom-servo,alt.religion.kibology,alt.fan.cecil-adams Message-ID: <3525190F.B6757617@bellsouth.net> Ben Walsh wrote: > > Did you work for the county? In Wichita? > > ben Nope, for the Government. In Biloxi. Regards, Al
Subject: Re: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: Greg Goss Newsgroups: alt.lifestyle.furry,alt.fan.tom-servo,alt.religion.kibology,alt.fan.cecil-adams Message-ID: <354345c5.16157171@news.direct.ca> Allen Greiner wrote: >Nope, for the Government. In Biloxi. Biloxi? Isn't that where they have the Government base where elves bake cookies?
Subject: Re: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: Infinity@world.std.com (Captain Infinity) Newsgroups: alt.lifestyle.furry,alt.fan.tom-servo,alt.religion.kibology,alt.fan.cecil-adams Message-ID: <3540f754.28663551@news-f.std.com> In article <3528d6b6.1880302@news.erols.com> Heck wrote: >Allen Greiner wrote: > >>Greg Goss wrote: >>> >>> Biloxi? Isn't that where they have the Government base where elves >>> bake cookies? >> >>Jeez, doesn't anyone check out the X-Files anymore??? Biloxi is the base >>where the Gov't has ELVIS baking cookies, not elves. >> >>Regards, >>Al > >Sucralose and Oleska are both highly toxic to squirrels. Why would those friendly cookie elves want to kill squirrels? Is it because they own those sneakers? Are the sneakers "bait" of some kind? What kind of sick twisted elf would use sneakers as bait for squirrels?[1] Come to think of it, what do those elves think of electrical lines running through their trees? Do they tap them to power their cookie-making machines? gah. So many questions, so little time. ** Captain Infinity ...[1] Cronan, this is *your* doing, isn't it?!!
Subject: Re: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: Mike Puterbaugh Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Message-ID: <35246615.5968834@newsstand.cit.cornell.edu> On Fri, 3 Apr 1998 01:44:56 GMT, Infinity@world.std.com (Captain Infinity) wrote: >Do squirrels think that humans hang wires from >poles so they can cross the street safely? > >If so, do they ever feel betrayed in the last >second before being electrocuted? I've wondered about dead squirrels a lot. Like a couple years ago where we found a dead squirrel behind my friend's shed, and it didn't have a head. It wasn't like a cat tore it off or anything--its head was just missing. We wrote a song about it: Oh squirrel You're dead behind the shed without a head When I looked to my left, what did I see It was you and you were dead And I had to pee Oh squirrel I wish I could have known you But I was just a boy Oh squirrel I wish I could have shown you my dress Oh squirrel. And then we played the song a bunch of times and people liked it and we recorded it and put it on our demo tape and gave it to this record company guy who said he liked it, but forgot to make us rich and famous. >And what the *hell* do they make of that pair of sneakers? Yeah, how DO they make that pair of sneakers? And why? I think they live in the sneakers, because there's not enough naturally occuring hollowed-out knotholes in trees any more, like the kind Chip and Dale Rescue Rangers live in. -m-
Subject: Re: Something I wonder about...about squirrels From: SJF 1959 Newsgroups: alt.fan.cecil-adams Message-ID: <1998040403165601.WAA06724@ladder01.news.aol.com> In article <35293d02.95660340@news-f.std.com>, Infinity@world.std.com (Captain Infinity) writes: > >Do squirrels think that humans hang wires from >poles so they can cross the street safely? > >If so, do they ever feel betrayed in the last >second before being electrocuted? > >And what the *hell* do they make of that pair of sneakers? Let's see. You apparently think that squirrels have an attention span suitable to constructing hypotheses or making attributions of betrayal? Time to cut back on those "Best of Rocky and Bullwinkle" film festivals. Regards from Deborah P.S. Natasha and Boris are fictional, too. Just thought you ought to know.
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